Low Cal Sugar Free Hot Chocolate

Hot chocolate is one heck of a delicious cold night comfort- HOWEVER it's laden with calories from saturated fat and sugar- two huge no-no's to those of us out there watching our figures!

My solution? My recipe for Low Cal Sugar Free Hot Chocolate....granted it's not going to be the "liquid chocolate in a cup" you might be able to get from the double chocolate triple fudge at the coffee shop around the corner- but it's got enough chocolate punch to satisfy any chocolate craving and the warm beverage keeps you hot and happy on cool nights!!

LOW CAL SUGAR FREE HOT CHOCOLATE

• 1 cup boiling water (OR for creamier flavor use 1 cup unsweetened chocolate almond milk)
• 2 TBSP Unsweetened Hershey's Cocoa
• 2 TSP Fat Free Coffeemate
• Stevia to taste ( I use more then usual in mine to give it some extra sweetness)

Bring the water or milk to a boil (I just microwave mine on high for about 3 minutes), then stir in the cocoa, coffeemate, and stevia.

Each cup made with water packs NEXT to NOTHING in Calories (approx 10) and if you add the unsweetened almond milk you're looking at about 40-45 calories per cup depending on the brand of Almond Milk you use!

What Running (And Failing At) A Race Taught Me

Pre-race, post-potty - the high point of my day.

The End: Shaking, incoherent, sobbing, vomiting and laying under all my blankets still in my sweat-soaked racing clothes: This was how my kids found mommy yesterday.

The Beginning: "Sure, give me some of your pills!" Famous. Last. Words.

That pretty much sums it up. But if you want all the gory details of my Worst Race Ever (swiftly followed by Very Important Life Lesson), read on:

The day dawned bright and beautiful and cold. Gym Buddies Allison, Megan and I met up all kitted out in our glittery skirts and painted hair. The drive in was easy, we quickly found a parking spot, we were plenty early for several potty breaks and I even got to meet Reader Jen at the starting line (which got awkward when Allison asked her if she wanted me to sign her bra. Jen replied, "Do people really ask you that?!" And I was like, "Um, NO. Just Allison!" I'm sorry Jen!). But even with everything going so swimmingly, I was still really anxious. Have to do my best, remember?

Allison and I after getting all prettied up.

It was my last long training run that did me in. My "fun" goal for the race was 1:30 for the ten miles - an easy 9 minute pace*. I knew I could do that. But then I had an awesome run outside. And then an even better one inside. I'd consistently paced at 8:40/mile. I didn't want to tell anyone for fear of jinxing myself but if I could shave that down to 8:30/mile that would be a personal record (PR) for me for this distance. Sure I'd have to run a hard race but I could do it! If I just had a little edge... Just, you know, something to give me a tiny push... Something like... a pill?

Seduced by the allure of a PR, I convinced one of the Gym Buddies who is into that sort of thing to give me a couple of caffeine pills. It's just caffeine, I reasoned. Sure I'm caffeine sensitive but it wasn't that much and my Gym Buddy uses them all the time and has had great results with them. I mean it's not like it was crack, right?

Might as well have been crack. Actually, crack would have been preferable.

I knew something was wrong about 20 minutes after I swallowed them. A strange fog came over my mind, my heart started pounding and I began to shake uncontrollably. Nausea rolled over me in waves. "Don't worry, you'll feel better once you start running," my friends reassured me. And for a few minutes I did. Then I realized something strange; I could no longer feel my limbs. You'd think this would be a bonus for an endurance race - hey, I'm flying! - but when I say I couldn't feel my limbs I mean I couldn't feel my body. It was the strangest feeling and not at all pleasant. I realized the downside to this when I tripped over a stick and caught it between my legs - it took me 10 feet to figure out why my legs weren't propelling me forward anymore. I also managed to tear off half my fingernail (Where? On what? Who knows??) and get a bruise on my thigh the size of a fist.

You remember the children's story The Red Shoes - little orphaned girl covets red dancing shoes, girl gets shoes and loves them more than anything else, the shoes become possessed and bind to her feet forcing her to dance until at last she convinces someone to chop off her feet. And then she dies! Charming little tale: deadly sin, demonic possession, punishment that way overshadows the crime - sure don't make fairytales like they used to! Well, I was now the girl in the red shoes. My legs only had one speed: sprint. So I ran the first three or four miles at a crazy pace and then it hit me. No, not another stick. The nausea that had been building now punched me in the stomach and I immediately knew I shouldn't have blogged about runners who poop their pants because I was pretty sure I was about to join their ranks. I stopped just long enough to blow chunks. Thankfully they came out of my mouth. (I never thought I'd be so grateful for barf!)

I have never, ever vomited during a race. Wanted to, yes. Done it, no. I walked a few paces and then my stupid possessed legs took off again. This became my strategy for the last 6 miles: sprint until I was 99% sure I was going to puke again and then walk. Sprint, heave, walk. Repeat. I'm pretty sure this particular strategy isn't covered in any of the major running manuals. Can't say I recommend it either. By mile 8 I just wanted to die. If I'd known the neighborhood at all, I would have ducked out of the race but I knew I had to make it to the finish line to find my friends and my ride home. So I continued to run the most schizophrenic race ever, alternately confusing and horrifying fellow runners and bystanders alike. Hey kids, don't do drugs!

The finish line is supposed to be a glorious moment where you sprint with your arms held high in the ecstasy of victory. I dragged over it after having walked most of the final mile, my possessed leg muscles twitching in protest. To be honest I don't remember much after that. I hugged Gym Buddy Dennis. Some man I didn't know gave me a picnic blanket to put over the two sweatshirts I was already wearing over my running clothes and I still couldn't stop shaking. I ate one bite of a salted nut roll only to throw it back up in my mouth. My legs were weak, I wanted to cry and my heart was beating so funny I was sure I'd just self-medicated myself into a heart attack. I kept a brave face on until I got home (at least I think I did, my friends would have to tell you how convincing I was) hoping that my husband would be home. He wasn't.

I burst into hysterical sobs, threw up again and eventually managed to drag myself into bed which is where my kids found me sometime later crying and hyperventilating. By the time my husband got up there I begged him to take me to the E.R. I was that sure I was dying. Instead he changed me into dry clothes, gave me a few sips of Sprite and put me back in bed where I spent the rest of the day. I couldn't eat a thing until this morning. Between sweat, tears and vomit I lost 3.5 pounds in 24 hours so while I missed my running best, I think I set a new PR in bodily fluid spewage.

To say I was bitterly disappointed in myself would be a massive understatement. I spent last night trying to decide which spot this event would take in my Top 10 List of Things I Most Regret. (Top 5, probably.) I spent most of this morning wishing for a do-over and calling myself every iteration of idiot I could muster. After avoiding it all day, I finally broke down and looked at my time on the race site. It wasn't great (1:37 - 9:40/mile) but you know what? It wasn't terrible. I finished. I cannot believe I finished at all. As far as mental toughness goes, this was by far the toughest race I have ever run. And yet I still did it.

Then I did something even better: I looked up the times for all of my friends that ran it. Since I'd puked up any last vestiges of pride and competitiveness, I was able to look at their times and just see their accomplishment. And it was a beautiful thing! I was so proud of them I started crying all over again but happy tears this time. Every person had to run their own race yesterday and they all did. Every single one finished. Megan got a PR in the half-marathon. Allison ran her first 10-miler and looked adorable doing it. Kandi & Ben finished within 1 second of each other (the couple that runs together, stays together!). Jeni ran her first 10-miler and hit her goal while her two young daughters cheered their hearts out for her. Other Megan #1 ran her first-ever half marathon and Other Megan #2 paced her step-for-step; they crossed together. Tom shaved 30 minutes off his last half time. Candice finished her first half marathon. Melissa and Julie and Greg and Other Megan #3 (seriously, we have that many Megans at the Y) and Jen and Other Allison all ran great runs.

In that moment I realized that if I can be proud of all of them - and I SO am! - then I can be proud of myself too. I may not be proud of what I did but I am proud of myself for finishing. And that is, after all, good enough.

What is your worst race story? Anyone else ever take a shortcut to help them only to have it massively backfire? What moment do you wish you could do over?

*I don't normally use actual numbers when I post because I know numbers are very triggering for some people and for the rest of us, well, comparisons are odious. My fast is your slow, my slow is your fast... whatever. But writing this out without the numbers ended up needing more calculus than I remember. My apologies if this made you nuts.

Post-race with our finisher's medals! Boy howdy did I earn this one.

A Special Thank You to YOU.

THIS is how awesome you guys are.

I just wanted to write a special thank you for all of you who took the time to comment on my "Being Good Enough: How to Separate Who You Are From What You Do" post. I've read through all your responses probably 10 times this weekend and you have no idea how much it helped me! Especially as the race itself was such a disaster. Your responses were deeply moving and thought provoking. Each one of you is such a blessing in my life and I feel immensely privileged that you take the time to share so much of yourselves with me. Thank you thank you thank you, my friends.

Jaime Koeppe

Jaime Koeppe calves ... wow..

Hooded

Katarina Vučetić listovi ( serbian model calves )

Known from reality show " Survivor "

Three Organs that make you FAT (or Skinny!)

Can't guess which three they are? They may surprise you, but the three organs in all of us that have a clear control over whether we're fat or skinny are;

1. Liver
2. Thyroid
3. Adrenal Glands

Combined, these three organs rule your metabolism and when they're not working up to snuff it becomes very hard for your body to build muscle, burn fat, and reap all the benefits from healthy eating and consistent exercising. It's REALLY important to remember to care for these organs when you consider your diet and lifestyle- flushing, detoxing, and cleansing these organs will help keep your body's metabolism revved.

Rather then tackle all three right now (and risk overwhelming you guys) I'll start with the liver, and save the thyroid and the adrenal glands for subsequent posts.

The liver makes proteins that regulate blood clotting, neutralizes toxins in the blood, produces immune agents to fight infection, generates bile to help digest fat, and stores glucose for energy. Your liver is basically the metabolic factory of the entire body, although most people don't realize it. The liver has the potential to make you a fat burning or a fat storing machine depending on how you care for it.

There are several ways in which your liver burns fat;

1. It manufactures bile acids, which act like laundry detergent (so to speak). They break down the cheese fries you ate last night.
2. Bile acids also switch on the activity of brown fat- a caloric incinerator that burns calories rather then storing them.
3. Bile acids also carry excess fat to the small intestines for disposal. If your diet is high in fiber from fruits, veggies, and whole grains then the unwanted fat is washed from the body via the bowels.

Your liver also has the detox job in the body- it works to detoxify everything you eat, drink, swallow, smoke, rub, or otherwise work into your bloodstream. Almost every substance found in your body or put in your body including chemicals, bacteria, hormones fungi, viruses, and parasites are filtered through the liver for removal. I tend to think of the liver as your body's garbage disposal. It works NONSTOP to clean up and remove junk from your body.

This makes your liver very vulnerable to overload. When overload occurs your liver ceases to operate optimally, and it cannot remove or detoxify all of the junk that comes its way. Nor can it do a good job of breaking down proteins, fats, or carbs. The body will start to poison itself.....this is often what happens to people who are chronically sick with headaches, inflammatory diseases, and skin disorders. Many of these chronic problems can be attributed to a sick liver. Toxins that cannot be processed by the liver (due to overload) escape into the bloodstream and weaken your immune system. The result can be autoimmune disorders like chronic fatigue syndrome, lupus, arthritis, and firbomyalgia. The body, in essence, turns on itself.

Creepy-I know. But the general public tends to think that as long as they're not throwing back booze every night the liver will take care of itself. NOT TRUE. We have more toxins in this country then the rest of the world, in fact third world residents have healthier livers then we do. They simply don't have chemically enhanced or additive laden foods or foods pumped up with hormones. In this country more people then ever are overweight and sick and health professionals are beginning to look inward for the answer- to our livers.

The following are some symptoms of a sick liver;

• Weight gain (in the midsection)
• Cellulite
• Bloating
• Allergies
• Gluten intolerance
• Indigestion
• Constipation
• High blood pressure
• High cholesterol
• Hormone imbalance
• Hypoglycemia
• Fatigue
• Depression
• Mood swings
• Yeast overgrowth
• Skin disorders
• Sleeplessness
• Bad breath
• Disorientation of confusion
• Itchiness
• Discolored stools

If ANY of these sound like you- it COULD be an overworked liver, in which case some damage control is needed. The liver is repairable- it can be restored and rejuvenated with a little TLC. Giving your liver some love will help your body burn fat more efficiently (weight loss) and will help make you less vulnerable to dietary indulgences. You won't have to "panic" when you indulge in a cheat meal or treat food as long as you get back to clean eating immediately after.

To help take care of your liver I recommend the following;

• Drink PLENTY of water-at LEAST two to three liters of pure water a day to help detox the body and assist the bile acids in flushing out the toxins. Add some lemon for flavor if needed- remember that water with lemon is a natural fat metabolizer and can burn fifty to seventy calories a day just from drinking it!
• Eat organic if you can! It contains fewer toxins and makes things easier on your liver
• Supplement with liver friendly herbs. I take milk thistle to help cleanse my liver. Milk thistle acts as an antioxidant in the liver, which means it fights free radicals. Other liver healers are licorice root, skullcap, red clover blossom, and slippery elm bark. You can find liver cleanse supplements that include blends or all or some of the above
• Increase your fiber- mostly from fruits, veggies, and whole grains.
• Get enough B Vitamins. B Vitamins are involved in the movement of fat. If in doubt take a B Vitamin multi.

One organ down- next up- THE THYROID!!!! :)

Pondering

Alon Gabbay: My Body Transformation

He calls himself "Sixpack", but the 23-year-old German top athlete Alon Gabbay has got far more than only amazing abs. His many fans admire his muscle gains, his definition, his proportions, and the passionate bodybuilder's knowledge. Alon documents his progress in this video: from 136 lbs to 187 lbs.



Body stats:
Height: 5' 9"
Weight: 187 lbs, plan to bulk up to 200 lbs
Bodyfat: 10.0%
Arms: 17.3 inches

Lifting stats:
Bench press: 330 lbs, 1 rep
Squat: 350 lbs, 5 reps
Deadlift: 420 lbs, 3 reps

Screen captures from the flexing video below:

Flexing video:



Alon's off season flexing:



Alon Gabbay flexes on CamWithHim.

Rich Fit/Fit tip... How do I lose weight & get shredded?

Eat often!

The mistake a lot of people make is to eat too few calories when both trying to lose weight and build muscle. This is a huge mistake, and the individuals who have learned this knows how sluggish his/her metabolism becomes. By eating often, you keep your calories in check and, at the same time, stimulate the metabolism. Cutting calories may seem the most obvious way to get shredded, but it often isn't the intelligent route. If you eat small meals from five to eight times per day with a protein source in each, you can get up to one-third leaner because your metabolism cannot sense that you are dieting. Once the body's furnace (your metabolism) senses that it might starve, it begins to slow down to conserve energy. Unlike an automobile, you want your body to burn inefficiently rather than efficiently. You want your metabolism to act like a Ferrari, not a Honda. Eating often is also a way to satisfy your psychological hunger and keep your body happily full of energy.

Live Fit, Be Fit, AbFitt!!

Rich-

Keep Holiday Pounds at Bay with 15 of my Healthy Holiday Tips!

Every holiday season, I hear clients of mine vow the same thing, "I will NOT gain weight this year." Yet another holiday season passes and statistics show that on average, women (more so then men) gain an average of 4 lbs in the two weeks between Christmas and New Years. That doesn't even take into account Turkey Day!! No matter how much we "vow" to not gain weight, it seems the holidays often get the best of us. I say it day in and day out to my clients, but I'll say it again- YOU NEED TO PLAN. Not having a plan is a surefire way to failure. Don't just talk the talk when it comes to the holidays, walk the walk! The following are 15 of my healthy holiday tips to help keep you ON TRACK and PLANNED this holiday season!

Tips 1-5: NUTRITION

1. Never arrive to a holiday, or holiday party hungry. NEVER. Before a big party I eat all of my planned meals for the day, just as I would on any normal day. This helps to keep me from overconsuming at the event. Many people make the mistake of starving themselves during the day to make room for the big meal, and this is a surefire way for weight gain. Another tip of mine? Drink a protein shake RIGHT before you walk in! I take one scoop of my Jay Robb protein powder in a blender bottle with water and chug it immeidately before I walk through the door. The protein helps to fill me up and prevent me from making split second poor food choices!

2. Enjoy some java and tea! Hot beverages help to keep you full, longer. Sipping on some flavored coffee or some freshly brewed hot tea also keeps your hands and mouth busy when you mingle. If I get sweet cravings at night I opt for a cup of decaf flavored coffee with some sugar free creamer. If I'm really hungry I'll add a scoop of chocolate protein powder to the hot coffee in a blender and make it a midnight mocha snack!

3. Be picky about the foods you indulge in. It IS the holidays, and I understand certain foods surface during the holiday season that you may not have the chance to eat any other time of the year. For example, my mom makes these insanely delicious mini pecan cookies around Christmas that she does not make during the rest of the year, so I choose to eat one or two of those, as opposed to all the other calorie laden foods at my family's house for the holidays. Skip the junk that you see day to day throughout the year and instead hone in on the one or two treats you absolutely LOVE that you cannot have any other occasion!

4. BE PLANNED! I cannot say this enough. Do not head to a holiday get together or a holiday meal without a plan. If you're headed to a buffet plan to load your plate 3/4 of the way full of fresh fruits and veggies from the veggie platter. The other 1/4 of the plate can be for sinful delights.I also recommend you bring a bottle of water and drink plenty of water to keep full. Sick of plain water? Add in some flavored Stevia packets ( I love Stevita drink sticks, I carry them in my purse!) or some lemon or lime slices for a light citrus flavor. When your body is thirsty it'll trigger false hunger signals because food contains a lot of water. Drink lots of water or hot tea to keep your hands busy and your mouth and belly full at parties!

5. Bring healthy food with you. Now I'm not saying you need to walk into a party with a cooler in tow (although if you wanted to hats off!) but stash your purse full of some healthy munchies. I recommend carrot sticks, celery sticks, rice cakes, 100 calorie snack packs of raw unsalted almonds, and maybe an apple or some fruit. Don't get caught in a sticky situation with nothing to eat but the garbage in front of you. Keeping "grab and go" snacks with you in your purse can help you out in a pinch if munchies get the best of you!

Tips 6-10: TRAINING & EXERCISE

6. Workout on the day of the party! I mean it- I always feel better, internally and externally, if I'm exercising. I'm a firm believer that exercise and nutrition play off of each other. By this I mean they help balance each other out- eating better propels you to exercise, and exercising propels you to make better choices nutritionally. If you physically feel great, healthy, and energized, you're not going to want to load your body down with crap, and mentally you won't want to ruin the amazing workout you just had by eating the wrong things.

7. PLAN AHEAD! If the gym you typically go to has reduced hours or is closed, or if the weather is keeping you from getting to your daily facility, then you need to have a backup plan. Invest in some workout DVDs, some exercise bands, or some light dumbbell weights so you have "at home" options in case. I keep my P90X DVDs on hand along with my doorframe pull up bars and my exercise bands so if I'm stuck at home I can still get a solid workout in! Don't make excuses, make results- be sure to plan ahead for less then optimal circumstances!

8. Sign up for a holiday run or run/walk! Locally, there's always a huge holiday fundraiser in the park for the local Humane chapter- in which owners run/walk with their dogs. I sign up every year because not only does the money go to a good cause but I also get the exercise from running or walking the 5k with my pooch!

9. If you're crunched for time with holiday shopping and party planning, up the amp on your workouts by intensifying your training. Incorporate supersets into your training to cut down on your gym time or throw plyos into your weight training to increase the cardio burn! Use your rest periods between sets actively by doing jump squats, pop squats, box jumps, or crunches to keep your heart rate up and increase your calorie/fat burn. Circuit style training not only cuts down on time but it keeps you moving which increases your body's fat burn. Don't skimp on the gym because of a time shortage, rather adjust your workouts accordingly so you have time to both train well AND shop well!

10. Look for oppurtunities to squeak in extra exercise! Park far away from the mall entrance, and walk briskly to and from the stores to get the heart rate up. Walk your dogs, go for a walk with your husband or significant other, enjoy a holiday post meal walk with friends or family. Going bar hopping? Park far away from the bars and bring a coat! Take advantage of every oppurtunity presented to burn some excess calories off!

Tips 11-15: BEHAVIOR & LIFESTYLE

11. Volunteer! I don't mean at the homeless shelter (although that's amazing too!!) but I mean to help out with the holiday meals! Take some initiative and offer to make a dish or a dessert for the big dinner. I ALWAYS offer to help my mom out by bringing a dish or a dessert. I opt to make low calorie, low sugar, or low fat versions of holiday favorites to cut calories. I include fruit in my desserts if possible and stay away from unhealthy, high fat, high sugar ingredients. That way I know there's at least one dish at the dinner that won't KILL my waistline!

12. Avoid the downward spiral- this is a good tip year round, but especially during the holidays when temptation lurks around every corner. If you mess up one day, or eat something junky for one meal, do not allow that one single step back to become an entire downward fall. Get back on track ASAP. Plan your next healthy meal and begin to make better decisions IMMEDIATELY. Chances are one slip here or there will not kill your fitness goals, what WILL kill them dead in your tracks is the continual over-eating or the continuous binge that can occur when people begin to let themselves slide.

13. It's in-evitable, people are going to be pushing food at you from all angles this holiday season. Be prepared, and plan ahead for what you're going to say when this happens. I know I sometimes just say that I'm full, and I'll take some food to go. Then, when I find the nearest trash can- in goes the food. Don't feel pressured, just feel PREPARED to politely decline food. Your family isn't going to understand why you don't want a second serving of Grandma's calorie laden potato filling, so be prepared with a response when they ask for an explanation!

14. Reward yourself- and not with food! Plan small rewards for yourself during the holiday season. It's important to set marks for yourself and give yourself a well earned pat on the back for adhering to your plan. For every week of scheduled workouts you complete or every week of planned meals you stick to- REWARD YOURSELF! Whether it's with a new winter hat, a manicure, or a cute holiday top- giving yourself small, NON food oriented rewards can help you feel good about what you're doing!

15. PLAN AHEAD. Everyone's schedule gets full around the holidays, so make sure you pencil in "workout" time and "food prep" time when you plan your week. Commit to 3-4 workout sessions a week, even if they're only 30 minutes each, and stick to that schedule. Leave your phone in the car if need be, or plug into your IPod to tune everyone else out, but make sure you get to the gym and get focused. Adjusting your workouts is one thing- cutting them out entirely is another. Careful planning and some clever strategy will ensure you get the job done!

BOOK NOW: I'm the Official Makeup Artist for the 2010 Erik Fankhouser WV State & Mid Atlantic Grand Prix!

I'm THRILLED to announce that I am the official makeup artist for the 2010 Erik Fankhouser West Virginia State and Mid Atlantic Grand Prix, held Saturday Nov 20, 2010!

• M.A.C
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For more information please click the banner above to reserve your slot TODAY! For more information on the show itself, or for an official entry form please CLICK HERE!

Looking for tanning services? Jan Tana spray tanning will be offered by the Official Tanning Service of the show, GST Fitness. Contact Gretchen Crass at Gretchen@gstfitness.com to book your spray tanning appointment today!

Peaks

Being Good Enough: How to Separate Who You Are From What You Do

The caption says "Not good enough for Beijing." Well there go my dreams of ever being a champion head lifter.

I'm nervous. Not nervous in a betrayed-by-my-bowels kind of way. Yet. (Which speaking of being betrayed by one's nethers, ESPN had the most fascinating article on explosive pooping while racing. Seriously, you must read it. It was in their Body Issue which I want to hate because it feels like using naked chicks to sell more copies a la the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue is so tired and yet I love it. Think less bikinis on the beach and more biceps. Lots more muscles. The cover even features a paraplegic tennis player! Of course she's gorgeous and starkers except for a strategically placed tennis racket but how cool is it that they put a woman in a wheelchair on the cover? There's such a fine line between art and artifice.)

I'm nervous for my race on Saturday. You know, the one that I signed up to run "just for fun" and have managed to suck all the fun right out of. (Well, almost. Gym Buddies Allison, Megan and I are running in sparkly tutus - mine's purple! - and striped knee-high socks. Fun!) I'm worried that I'm not going to be good enough. What is good enough, you ask? No idea! Like Alice at the fork in the woods, I don't know what the end goal is. Of course Alice had the Cheshire cat mocking her and her angst. At least I'm feline free. And like Alice, I realized today that I need to decide now, before I take even one step in the race, what the end is going to be. That whatever I do is going to be good enough. Finishing will be good enough. Even if I don't run my 100% best race, I'll still be good enough.

This is difficult for me to believe because I'm so used to defining myself by what I do. At times this has worked well for me. Like when I got straight A's in school then I was Charlotte the Smart Girl. It cuts both ways though. I remember the first time I decided that I was Charlotte the Bad Person because of something I'd done.

"Charlotte?" My high school teacher frowned at the note, "You're to go to the office. The police want to talk to you." Yeah he actually read it out loud. There were some gasps, lots of snickers. Nothing says fun like getting pulled out of 3rd period by the police! By the time I got to the office I was shaking head to toe. I was having visions of being an unwitting drug mule like Brokedown Palace and I'm nowhere near as cute as Claire Danes in prison clothes. Does the U.S. deport underage non-cute unknown-package acceptors?

Someone handed me the phone. "Charlotte? This is Detective Johnson from the Police Department. Do you know a Nathaniel X?"

My mouth went dry and I knew this phone call had been a long time coming. "Yes," I squeaked. Nathaniel and I worked together at the local university and even now it's hard for me to describe our relationship without putting unsure quotation marks around each descriptor. We were "friends", certainly. For awhile "best" friends even. We were together all the time. Despite our ten-year age difference, I had a massive school-girl crush on him. He might have had one on me too. To this day I don't know whether he really loved me, just thought he loved me or was only pretending to love me in order to manipulate me. He was the first boy to tell me he loved me. He was the first boy to tell me I was sexy. He was also as crazy as a guy's night out with Charlie Sheen, Mel Gibson, Michael Jackson and Robert Downey Jr. And unfortunately his brand of crazy manifested as pervert. Which meshed perfectly with my brand of crazy - insecure.

I became his confidant for things that no fifteen-year-old should know. Every conversation with him would start "You can never tell anyone this. Do you promise me? You're the only person I trust." I was too young to know that anytime anyone says this, that telling anyone and everyone is exactly what you should do. So I kept his secrets. And became a erstwhile victim of some of them. The more he told me, the less I wanted to know and the more I believed him when he said I was a part of all this.

The police, apparently, agreed. "Do you know where Sara is?"

"Isn't she in school?" I whispered.

"No, I'm afraid Sara's gone missing." The detective added, "And her parents think you might know where she is." Sara was one of my oldest friends and even though we'd grown apart since the advent of high school - she was cool, I was not - when Nathaniel had asked me for her number I gave it to him. Do not misunderstand the magnitude of this. I knew what he was. I pimped out the girl with whom I still had the "friends" half of a "friends forever" heart necklace.

I burst into hysterical tears, sobbing mascara streaks all over the secretary's shoulder. I didn't know where she was and that was the truth. But what I did know was that she was alternately intrigued by and afraid of Nathaniel and his overwhelming advances. Much like myself, I suppose. And now Sara was gone. Plucked, so they told me, right off the street when she went to take care of a vacationing neighbor's pet. Would she have gone willingly with Nathaniel? Perhaps. Would he have taken her if she hadn't? Did he? I didn't ask why he hadn't taken me.

"Can you contact Nathaniel?"

I could. I had his private pager number. I had his e-mail. I knew the chat rooms to find him in. I knew he would answer if I called him. And so the sting was set with me as the bait. Even then I was conflicted. Torn between wanting to warn him, an impulse that baffles me today, and wanting him caught as soon as possible. It dragged on for weeks as I printed out copies of every cryptic e-mail, had short stilted phone conversations with an officer listening on the other line and typed in chat rooms with a cop taking notes next to me. I only talked to Sara once and she told me she was fine and to leave her alone before he took the phone from her and hung it up. I cried as I listened to the dial tone for 10 minutes.

If this were TV, this would be the climactic moment where I jump in and do something terribly risky and yet heroic like drive out to the deserted barn and unchain my friend while fighting him off with a horse whip and my razor wit. Instead... nothing happened. Eventually Sara showed back up at home. Except she wasn't really Sara anymore. I didn't see her smile or laugh for a long time. In fact I didn't see much of her period. Nathaniel, on the other hand, was more in than out of my life for the next several years. Sara had refused to talk to the police, refused to press any charges and the information from me was not enough to convict so he was free to do as he wished. What is a girl to do after she's participated in a police sting that ends messily with the perpetrator still in her life and the cops totally out of it?

I internalized it. I made it my All My Fault because that was the only thing I had control over. I ended up tearily apologizing to Sara for not protecting her (which only earned me a glassy stare) and then tearily apologizing to him for the betrayal (which got me this). And with every word I knew: Charlotte was Bad. I created this terrible thing and therefore I must be terrible. The worst effect of this was how perfectly it set me up for the next man to abuse me, for the horrific spectacle of the Very Bad Boyfriend.

Charlotte back then had no intrinsic self worth, I was only a sum of my actions. And as extreme as this sounds, it's a belief that much of our society reinforces today. People are made and taken apart for what they do in their jobs, in sports, with their bodies. You are only as good as your next big accomplishment and only as far away from bad as your next big failure. And nothing is ever good enough.

But I refuse this black and white interpretation. I am not fifteen anymore. There has got to be a line between who I am and what I can do. I just need to take a deep breath so I can find it. Because in the end, this fear of failure is permission not to try. And I'm better than that.

There is great power in good enough.

There are some posts that I really agonize about posting and this is one of them. (And yes, some of them do remain unpublished.) I may regret writing this but I'm putting it out there in the hope that perhaps you can tell me how you figured out how to separate who you are from what you do. How do you get over that paralyzing fear that you will never be good enough? How do you stop feeling like you always have to one-up yourself? And was anyone else totally fascinated by that ESPN race-pooping article??

Upside Down

Calves Woman with pole dance

Reading in Bed

Eric Barrenger: How I Train My Huge Arms

The muscle boy in the white tank top. This is one of Eric Barrenger's most popular photos. Now the 20-year-old bodybuilder is back with two videos showing his complete arm workout. The videos include a comprehensive interview in which Eric tells everything about his training, nutrition and approach to bodybuilding.

Video part 1:



Video part 2:

Touching in the Gym: People Skills 101

I wonder what the Yoga Guru would have said about this kind of yogic touching.

My friends paid a boy to kiss me. I was sweet sixteen and never been kissed - a fact that I remain unapologetic about to this day - but my friends decided that the best birthday present they could give me would be a soft-lipped hottie to revoke my VL membership. It didn't quite turn out the way they had planned. First of all, the only person they could come up with was a random frat boy from the local university. I don't think any of us, least of all me, even knew his name. Second, they paid him $20 which given the state of his hygeine I think he should have paid me.

Much to my parents' amusement, my friends tarted me up (which in those days involved a lot of black eyeliner, ratty clothing and jewelry with spiders on it) and then trotted me off to meet said boy. He was behind a friend's house, half hidden in the shadows like some kind of pervert. Which, given his age, my age and the circumstances, he kind of was. Before I could even get a good look at him (floppy hair, acne, muscley arms), he growled, "So how you wanna do this?"

I snorted, adjusted my goth jewelry and growled back, "I don't know. I'm the amateur here, remember?"

And so I got a "cat's butt kiss" - aptly christened by my high school friend T to describe the similarity between my tightly puckered mouth and and the business end of a feline - for my first kiss.

"What was it like?" my friends all shrieked before The Hired Help was even out of ear shot.

"Like kissing my dad."

He hung his head. I blushed. Everyone was humiliated. Mission accomplished.

This little episode of Bad Touch 101 was brought to mind the other day when I asked a Yoga Guru a question and she gave me a totally unexpected answer.

My Yoga Question: "My instructor never adjusts me. Is it appropriate to ask her to do so? She seems to be "hands off" in general but otherwise a good teacher." (Backstory: I love yoga. In every yoga class I've ever taken, the teacher has always done little manual adjustments to my form. It helps. I can't see myself when I'm upside down. And a teeny adjustment can make a huge difference in the effectiveness of the pose.)

The Yoga Guru's Answer: Is very long. But in summary they basically said that I might be a perv. Or the teacher might be a perv. Or perhaps neither one of us are pervs but instead might have been touched by pervs in the past (which, as you all know, I have) and therefore might interpret any touch as pervy. It was all very My Body, My Rules from eighth grade health class.

Bad Touch
It was not what I had expected. But it sure did give me a lot to think about because gyms are a unique environment for touching, both good and bad. Most of the girls I know have had some kind of workout experience involving bad touch from a man - usually just a touch or a pat done accidentally-on-purpose. (Another classic is the boob-squishage hug also known as the reason I will only sweaty hug girls now.) My last memorable experience of this type involved a man who, over the course of a five-minute conversation, kept moving closer and closer to me. To which I responded by stepping farther and farther back. Until I was literally up against a wall. I actually had to duck under his arm and push him out of my way to end the conversation. Which thankfully he let me do. I don't think he meant me any harm. I think he was just oblivious. But it still made my heart pound in a very uncomfortable way.

The opposite may also be true although I don't have any first-hand knowledge of it. Any of you guys ever been on the receiving end of unwanted attention at the gym?

Good Touch
The thing is, the gym is a great place to practice good touching. A high five, a pat on the shoulder, a form correction or a close spot can all be good, helpful things. I've been known to give Gym Buddy Allison a big sweaty hug on occasion. And Gym Buddy Megan smacks my rear when she laps me on the track - a kind of combination giddyap-girl and friendly hello. Although you really have to be careful with the butt-smacking: I once had a boot-camp instructor smack the woman in front of me on the rear. I was so appalled I almost considered quitting the class right then and there. He must have seen my face because when he caught up to me on the next lap he explained the woman was his wife and that he would never, ever touch anyone else's tushie. And he's kept good on that promise, thank heavens.

Weird Touch
And then there's weird touch. Gyms are a hot bed of weird touch. Like when a male friend and I were running side-by-side in bootcamp one day and his arm hit my arm and whacked my hand down onto his thigh. Both of us blushed redder than the fire hydrant that he had dodged, which caused the embarrassing accident in the first place. He spent the next solid mile apologizing. And I spent the next mile after that telling him he didn't need to apologize.

Or just last week in Hip Hop, Turbo Jennie and I were dancing in near proximity to each other when she turned towards me at the exact moment I was doing some variation of the rodeo/who's-your-daddy move and it was all Girls Gone Wild up in there for about 3 seconds. "Keep it g-rated, Charlotte!" she yelled and I was so embarrassed that I flubbed the next 4 measures. Yeah, I accidentally freaked on my aerobics instructor.

Awkward.

Touchy Feely
So let this be a lesson to you: don't be me. Oh, wait. No, the lesson here is that there are rules and the rules are there for a reason. And the rules state that you are never to touch anyone, anywhere, for any reason. And if you decide to thwart rule number one, then you must publicly declare - preferably in writing - your intentions and the expected result. And if you still insist on touching, then at least offer to take me to dinner first.

So, enough of my embarrassing moments! Let's hear yours!! Good touch, bad touch or weird touch - what's your story of gym awkwardness? Can anyone top me for the worst first kiss ever??

Off with It

Calisthenics

Marie Claire Says TV Show about "Fatties" is Socially Irresponsible

This Dr. Phil poster may be a joke but many people are serious about their cruel comments.

Marie Claire has done it again! After the article that rocked the food-blogging world (which was nasty, sneaky and unfair... and also made some very valid points that I am still thinking about) last month, the lady mag is back in fine foot-in-mouth form with a new article titled "Should Fatties Get a Room (Even on TV)?" that claims to explore whether programming starring happy fat people is "disturbing" and "implicitly promoting obesity." Their unsurprising fashion-mag answer: yes and yes. (Which I find hilariously ironic considering their main complaint about the food bloggers is that they promote unhealthy ideals with their obsessive food restriction and exercise. Apparently you can't win unless you spring forth from the womb perfectly formed.)

I don't watch TV. If you didn't know that explicitly you have probably guessed it from how culturally clueless I am. And yet I do remember one thing from hazy college TV-show obsessed days (Holla Felicity and America's Next Top Model!) and that is this: You don't mess with Sookie. Gilmore Girls was brilliant and not just because I couldn't decide who I wanted to be more - Alexis Bledel or her "mom" Lauren Graham as they were both so witty and adorable. All of the characters on the show were funny, relatable and entertaining. One of the standouts on the show Sookie, played by Melissa McCarthy, who was a chef, a spitfire of a best friend and a comedienne in her own right. Oh and did I mention she was a bit chubby?

Well the (un-Kirstie Alley) fat actress has a new show out called "Mike & Molly" about an overweight couple who meets at Overeaters Anonymous and falls in love. Typical schlocky sitcom hijinks ensue and the show would probably have barely shown up on the radar if it were not for Marie Claire blogger Maura Kelly's post on how a show featuring two obese people in love is disgusting. In her own words, "So anyway, yes, I think I'd be grossed out if I had to watch two characters with rolls and rolls of fat kissing each other ... because I'd be grossed out if I had to watch them doing anything. To be brutally honest, even in real life, I find it aesthetically displeasing to watch a very, very fat person simply walk across a room - just like I'd find it distressing if I saw a very drunk person stumbling across a bar or a heroine addict slumping in a chair."

Wow, did she really just say that out loud? Yep. And she continues with the tired I-have-a-fat/gay/black/grinder monkey for a friend trope, "Now, don't go getting the wrong impression: I have a few friends who could be called plump. I'm not some size-ist jerk. And I also know how tough it can be for truly heavy people to psych themselves up for the long process of slimming down. (For instance, the overweight maintenance guy at my gym has talked to me a little bit about how it seems worthless for him to even try working out, because he's been heavy for as long as he can remember.)"

Oh well if you know a fat janitor then it's totally okay! She goes on to tell obese people that if they just try hard enough they can lose the weight writing, "But ... I think obesity is something that most people have a ton of control over. It's something they can change, if only they put their minds to it." and then giving overly simplistic, albeit true tips like "eat more fresh and unprocessed foods" and "visit your local YMCA." Yes, it really is that bad.

But now that I've pointed out the egregious error - and it is as easy as falling of the curb to jump on Kelly, heck half the Internet is (the other half is too busy arguing over whether Christine O'Donnell is a moronic constitutional illiterate or a nuanced legal genius) - I feel inclined to point out that she's really not the problem. Many, many people feel this way. Remember Anna Wintour being horrified at the Mall of America not by the fact that Forever 21 sits right next to Prada but because she thinks all Midwesterners look like "little houses"? Most people just don't say it out loud. Kelly is the whipping girl because she wrote it in black and white (and doesn't have the entire fashion world at her back).

Jezebel points out that, to her credit, Kelly tries to atone in the comments by saying her remarks are lingering effects of her previous history of anorexia. "Though I don't think of myself as anorexic any more, being freaked out by obesity to the insensitive, even cruel, point that I was is certainly a vestige of the anorexic mindset; maybe so was being righteous about how easy it is to lose weight. (Because once I lost an extreme amount of weight, of course—about half my body weight—etc.)." I can personally attest to the mental havoc that eating disorders wreak. Not only do you have no concept of what you as a person look like, you really don't see other people accurately either. And the crazy doesn't go away just because you start eating again.

So I don't fault her for thinking these thoughts - she is just parroting the cultural zeitgeist of body-hate - but I think we should focus on the larger issue of challenging the validity of these thoughts. For me I don't care whether or not obese people are "gross" to watch kiss or more expensive to insure or are taking up two airplane seats or are riding zebras in Kenya whilst singing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts." The point for me is that they are people before they are anything else. And all people, whether they be obese or elderly or handicapped or colicky infants or felons or rogue inflatable-slide-riding flight attendants, deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.

How do you feel about a TV show starring two happy obese people? What do you think of Kelly's take on it? Is her history of an eating disorder a valid mea culpa?

The First Review of My Book! Squeee!

Tracey over at I'm Not Superhuman posted her excellent review of my book. To which I responded by stalking all her commenters and thanking them for even considering reading my book. 'Cause that's not at all weird. Nope.

So if you need more reasons to buy my book - and read some excerpts! - go read her review!

Also, while you're roving the Internet, if you pre-order my book now it's only $10. After the release it will go up to the full price of $14.95! It's the perfect New Year's Gift (which is not exactly a gift-giving occasion but whatevs) - your friends and family will laugh so hard that they'll get a complimentary ab workout free with the book:)

Penn

Mark Salling

Yann: Big Arms At Gold's Gym

This man is a fighter when he is training. At Gold's Gym in Las Vegas, the place where big bodybuilders are made, handsome French bodybuilder Yann demonstrates his comprehensive arm workout. Four videos:

Video 1: Bicep curls



Video 2: Hammer curls



Video 3: Preacher curl machine



Video 4: Triceps

The Best Indicator of Your Overall Health [Hint: It's not what you think]

It's not your BMI. It's not your cholesterol. It's also not your resting heart rate, your back squat max, your weight, your body fat percentage, your BMR, your RMR, your AT or even your SDTG. (Okay, I made that last one up; some of the alphabet was feeling left out.) It's definitely not your shoe size (although that is important to know). So what is the number that researchers have found that is the single best indicator of your overall health? Your VO2 max.

Which is how I found myself awake in a puddle of cold sweat at three a.m. last night. I am not a person who normally dreads a workout but whether it was flashbacks of Middle School P.E. - my teacher used to chase me around the track throwing footballs at my head until I cried - or just my perfectionist nature, I was scared. See, first thing in the morning in Boot Camp, the Gym Buddies and I were taking the Cooper Fitness test, an assessment used to find your VO2 max. And would consequently tell me if I am a worthwhile human being. (Note to self: write post about how I give numbers too much power in my life.)

How To Get Yours (For Free!)
The most accurate way to measure your VO2 max is to do the Darth-Vader-masked-run-on-a-treadmill test but that's spendy - expect to pay 150$ - 300$ - and I am nothing if not cheap. Also, the last time I did that test I almost* mooned the whole gym because I was running so hard my pants were falling down and I didn't dare spare a hand to hold them up because I was too occupied trying to keep my hands from ripping that suffocating mask off my face and hurling it at the nearest trainer.

The Cooper Test goes like this: run as hard as you can for 12 minutes and then given the distance that you cover (in meters, naturally, we're being scientific here remember?) and your age you can get a fairly accurate approximation of your VO2 max. It was exactly as fun as it sounds. Which is not at all. It was horrible pain. Maximal effort is bad enough in 20 second increments during Tabata sprints; it's hellacious when you do it for 12 minutes. Upon finishing our run - in a heap, on the dirty gym floor - Gym Buddy Allison exclaimed, "My insides have never hurt so much before!" But our suffering was not in vain: I'm proud to say all the Gym Buddies scored in the highest rank for both the run and our VO2 maxes.

(We won't talk about how this wasn't good enough for me because it was lower than the last time I had my max measured even though that was to be expected as we lose about 1% of our VO2 max per year as we age. So I stewed about it all day until Allison told me to get a grip and learn to live with being "just superior". Seriously, self, get on that "numbers mean too much to you" post.)

So why would anyone do such a thing to themselves just to get a number?

Your VO2 Max is your maximal oxygen uptake and reflects how well your body takes in and uses oxygen while you exercise. VO2 max "is widely accepted as the single best measure of cardiovascular fitness and maximal aerobic power. Absolute values of VO₂ max are typically 40-60% higher in men than in women.” Your average man has a VO2 max of 45, while an average woman's is 38. Just for comparison purposes (because who doesn't like to compare suburban soccer moms with the world's most elite athletes?), Greg LeMond's is 92.5 and the highest ever recorded, belonging to a Scandinavian cross country skier for which my keyboard doesn't even have the ability to type his name, is 96 - in his off season.

The Research
Danish researchers examined 86 men and 115 women, all between the ages of 23 and 27. They tested their VO2 max. They then studied their physical activity, blood pressure, blood lipids, body fat and smoking habits. As expected, a greater VO2 max was significantly correlated with a better cardiovascular profile. (And for your surprising research finding of the day: Physical activity was not correlated with a better cardiovascular profile.) This means that the higher the VO2 max, the lower the LDL cholesterol, body fat, and blood pressure. They also found that a higher VO2 max a correlates with a decrease in symptoms of the scary metabolic syndrome and is an "excellent predictor" of heart attack risk.

The take-home message from today's workout is if you want to lower your cholesterol, blood pressure, body fat and bikini inhibitions, then your workouts need to be intense enough to increase your VO2 max. If better heart health is your goal, it isn't enough just to be physically active (although physical activity of any intensity has numerous other benefits). You have to keep pushing yourself. Never get comfortable! And also: Remember that numbers are just tools to help you understand yourself better, they are not value judgments. (Repeat three times every morning.)

So do you know your VO2 max? How important are numbers to you? Are you able to look at them as just information or do they pack an emotional wallop too? Have you ever mooned anyone accidentally or on purpose??

*Not to be confused with the time I DID actually moon the whole gym thanks to a heavy pager from the childcare center attached to my weakly elasticized yoga pants. Good times!

On this year's contest diet- FRIES! NO JOKE!

Like my fries? These could be yours to chow down on when prepping for a show- and NO I'm not joking!!!!

This recipe is 100% contest prep friendly- but of course here comes my disclaimer- CONTACT YOUR NUTRITIONIST OR COACH FIRST to make sure this complies!!!

Don't go whipping up sweet potato fries without asking permission first!

Most competitors are allowed sweet potatoes on their diet, however plain baked sweet potatoes get old, fast. If you're a french fry gal (and most of us out there are) then this is a recipe for you! Trust me, these can be a lifesaver in prepping for a show and are incredibly easy to make!

You will need the following;

• Your alloted amount of sweet potato ( by this I mean if you're eating 2 ounces, grab your two ounces sweet potato (raw), if you're eating 4, grab 4, just make sure your sweet potato is raw (UNCOOKED!)
• Preheat the oven to 425 degrees. If your oven is on the dull side, try 450 or you'll be waiting forever for these to be done.
• 1 TBSP Extra Virgin Olive Oil mixed with 1 TBSP water (combine in a spray bottle and shake up!)
• Pinch red pepper (if spicy isn't your thing use regular pepper)
• Pinch salt

Lightly spritz a piece of aluminum foil with PAM (LIGHTLY, Pam has calories so don't go coating it). Slice your potato length wise into "fry" looking pieces and arrrange on foil. Spritz with the olive oil water mixture, then sprinkle with salt and pepper to desired taste. Place in oven for approx. 30 minutes although you will need to check these. I like mine super well done, so I leave them in longer. If you like fries NOT well done, check them at 25 minutes and assess from there!

Think Big....as in BIG V-TAPER!

Consider training rear delts on back day to help blow up your V-Taper....it's true! Although nothing is black and white in bodybuilding or figure, and I always say there's more then one way to skin a cat, I've noticed growth in my own V-Taper as a result of training my rears on back day, NOT shoulder day.

Many back exercises already recruit the rear delts into the picture- bent over barbell rows, reverse grip bent over rows, one arm dumbbell row and seated cable row all call on the rear deltoids to aid in the movement. If this is the case (and it is) why not train rear delts with back?

If you're into the science behind this- here goes: The rear deltoids extend the humorous via horizontal abduction- in which you bring your arms from a beginning point of being in front of the body, to your sides. So obviously it's no surprise that the rear deltoids aid in back exercises- especially rowing movements where you are bringing your elbows BEHIND the plane of your body.

Your rear deltoids assist the lats, rhomboids, and middle traps during back movements, yet are considerably LESS active in movements like overhead shoulder presses, which are chiefly accomplished through your front and lateral deltoids, as well as some triceps. I hope you guys are all still with me on this- basically what I'm saying is there's an arguable case FOR training rears WITH back, not WITH shoulders.

Now granted I have friends who would never consider doing this- some argue that BECAUSE the rear deltoids aren't as fatigued when trained with shoulders you can focus on them better. If they're highly fatigued after a number of exercises (back exercises) then you cannot focus on them as well. Some hit rears a bit on back day and a bit on shoulder day as well (just be sure to allow 48 hours between these two workouts to recover!)

The following is ONE of the many workouts I've used to blast my V-Taper- i.e my back and rear delts. I do not train traps, as big traps aren't desirable in a figure girl, but if you DO train traps, you can easily work some trap exercises into this routine as well. I alter sets and reps according to where I'm at in my training and what my physique goals are, so feel free to insert sets and reps you prefer!

BACK/REAR DELT ASSAULT

1. Wide Grip Lateral Pulldown: Sets, 4. Reps, 15, 12, 10, 8 *I go as wide as I can and focus on form, not weight. I arch my lower back, drop the bar to my chest, and keep my elbows in front of my body as much as possible so I hit the ENTIRE lat (full range of motion.)
2. Reverse Grip Seated Cable Row: Sets, 3. Reps, 10,10,10 *Because of the angle of the arms in relation to the body this is an EXCELLENT lower lat movement. The underhand grip will call the biceps into play a bit, so keep backward lean to a minimum and aim to pull the bar directly towards your midsection.
3. One Arm Smith Machine Row: Sets, 3. Reps, 12, 12, 12*I like doing these on the smith machine because the smith machine is stable, so you don't need to worry about balance as much, therefore you can use more weight (if you want). You can also shift muscle emphasis using hand placement so play around-just be sure to keep that back STRAIGHT.
4. Neutral Grip Front Pulldown: Sets, 4. Reps, 15,12, 10, 8*A neutral grip allows you to go a bit heavier then an overhand grip. This is a great lower lat exercise. Don't swing when you do these, again arch your back, minimize leaning and pull the bar straight down into your upper chest.
5. Supported Two Arm Dumbbell Row: Sets, 3. Reps, 12, 12, 12 *I use an incline bench, adjusted to about 45 degrees. I LOVE this exercise because the bench removes torque and the need for stability- you CANNOT swing or overcompensate with other muscle groups on this exercise! You'll probably have to use lighter weights then you may think in order to really hit the back and rears. I usually feel these in my middle and upper traps a bit as well.
6. Bent over One Arm Cable Lateral Raise: Sets, 3. Reps, 10,10,10 *Next to dumbbells I love cable exercises the most because they provide constant tension, especially in the start position, whereas the dumbbell does not. Since the resistance is horizontal this makes the start position difficult, this may be one you use lighter weight on. I take a wide stance, bend my knees a bit, keep my back flat and use either a palm in (neutral grip) or overhand grip. Try to keep the angle of your elbow the same and force the rear delt to work. This is form exercise, not weight.
7. Reverse Pec Deck Fly: Sets, 3. Reps, 10,10,10 *One of the only machines I like, because rear deltoid exercises are so form based most people don't do them properly. The machine forces your body into the right position by locking your arms (so to speak). Use a palm down neutral position and keep your chest into the pad the entire time. Bring your arms back as far as possible by squeezing your shoulder blades together. I tend to hold these for a count.
8. Bent Over Dumbbell Reverse Fly: Sets 3. Reps, 15, 15, 15 *I go high rep on these, with minimal rest between sets to burn out my rears. I stand legs bent a bit, wide stance, back straight and hold two dumbbells, palm facing inward. Really use the mind to muscle connection to bring the weight back, if done right these will burn out your rears perfectly, which is why I love to finish with them!